"I was once kissed on the lips by a giraffe,
and I don't think I've ever got over it."
~ Joanna Lumley, actress
"You can't always write a chord ugly enough to
say what you want to say, so sometimes you have
to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream."
~ Frank Zappa, musician
"Does the giraffe know what he's for? Or care?
Or even think about his place in things?
A giraffe has a black tongue twenty-seven
inches long and no vocal cords. A giraffe has
nothing to say. He just goes on giraffing."
~ Robert Fulghum, author
"Only a friend or a giraffe would stick his
neck out for you. But only a giraffe would
eat all the leaves off your tree so he could
peek in your second-story bedroom window."
~ Jarod Kintz, author
"I like you, 'cause you look like a giraffe
stretching out its neck to get to fruit in a tall tree."
~ Of Montreal, rock band
"The reason why there aren't more travelers
is that your average physicist refuses to
be eaten by a giraffe in the name of science."
~ Bradley Sands, writer
"I'd sell a giraffe and give you
half just to occupy my mind."
~ The Tragically Hip, rock band
"I had a dream about you coming up with
non sequiturs. You were a purple giraffe and I was
an orange rhino. But we were eating liquid skittles."
~ Ryan Lilly, author
"I know who I am. No one else knows who
I am. If I was a giraffe, and someone said I
was a snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe."
~ Richard Gere, actor
"I know it sounds weird, but I just have a thing
for giraffes. I got to wondering if you could own
a giraffe and if so, how much would a giraffe cost?"
~ Kellie Pickler, singer
"Riding down the path
on the back of a giraffe.
Me and the giraffe laughed,
'cause I passed some gas."
~ Red Hot Chili Peppers, rock band
"You need that guy like
a giraffe needs strep throat."
~ Ann Landers, columnist
"I am an evil giraffe, and I shall eat more
leaves from this tree than perhaps
I should, so that other giraffes may die."
~ Eddie Izzard, comedian
"The man who believes in
giraffes would swallow anything."
~ Adrian Mitchell, poet
"One last hurrah for the drunk giraffe!"
~ Matt Smith, actor
"If I had a big giraffe, he'd have to take a real
long bath. And that's why waterfalls are really neat."
~ Dwight Yoakam, singer
"I wouldn't believe your wireless radio
if I had myself a flying giraffe."
~ Stereophonics, rock band
"I want to buy a lighthouse,
and ride a giraffe on the rocks."
~ Patrick Wolf, singer