Bizarre Quotes About Giraffes

"I was once kissed on the lips by a giraffe, 

and I don't think I've ever got over it."  

~  Joanna Lumley, actress

"You can't always write a chord ugly enough to

say what you want to say, so sometimes you have 

to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream." 

  ~  Frank Zappa, musician

"Does the giraffe know what he's for? Or care? 

Or even think about his place in things? 

A giraffe has a black tongue twenty-seven 

inches long and no vocal cords. A giraffe has 

nothing to say. He just goes on giraffing."  

~  Robert Fulghum, author

"Only a friend or a giraffe would stick his 

neck out for you. But only a giraffe would 

eat all the leaves off your tree so he could 

peek in your second-story bedroom window."  

~  Jarod Kintz, author

"I like you, 'cause you look like a giraffe 

stretching out its neck to get to fruit in a tall tree."  

~  Of Montreal, rock band

"The reason why there aren't more travelers 

is that your average physicist refuses to 

be eaten by a giraffe in the name of science."  

~  Bradley Sands, writer

"I'd sell a giraffe and give you 

half just to occupy my mind."  

~  The Tragically Hip, rock band

"I had a dream about you coming up with 

non sequiturs. You were a purple giraffe and I was 

an orange rhino. But we were eating liquid skittles."  

~  Ryan Lilly, author

"I know who I am. No one else knows who

I am. If I was a giraffe, and someone said I 

was a snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe."  

~  Richard Gere, actor

"I know it sounds weird, but I just have a thing

for giraffes. I got to wondering if you could own

a giraffe and if so, how much would a giraffe cost?"  

~  Kellie Pickler, singer

"Riding down the path 

on the back of a giraffe. 

Me and the giraffe laughed, 

'cause I passed some gas."  

~  Red Hot Chili Peppers, rock band

"You need that guy like 

a giraffe needs strep throat."  

~  Ann Landers, columnist

"I am an evil giraffe, and I shall eat more 

leaves from this tree than perhaps 

I should, so that other giraffes may die."  

~  Eddie Izzard, comedian

"The man who believes in 

giraffes would swallow anything."  

~  Adrian Mitchell, poet

"One last hurrah for the drunk giraffe!"  

~  Matt Smith, actor

"If I had a big giraffe, he'd have to take a real 

long bath. And that's why waterfalls are really neat."  

~  Dwight Yoakam, singer

"I wouldn't believe your wireless radio 

if I had myself a flying giraffe."  

~  Stereophonics, rock band

"I want to buy a lighthouse, 

and ride a giraffe on the rocks."  

~  Patrick Wolf, singer